Bum Etiquette

Nicki Minaj sings that she wishes she “could have this moment for life.” After singing that
for 4 minutes, hasn’t that moment passed?

There’s a urology office in Alhambra, CA, called Dikranian Urology.  Think about it.

I know these waterfree urinals are supposed to save the world and all, but some of these
urinals need water. Some of them are insanely filthy. Some of that buildup looks like blocks of cheddar. Oh…Oh God…Urrrrrgh…Blurpurrugh. I just lost my appetite.

There should be some sort of standard for panhandling. Some type of bum etiquette. When you get approached by someone yelling, “Ay man! Gimme some money! I know you got some change, you muthafukkin’ stank-ass bitch,” you’re probably going to be less inclined to help him out.

If your store’s security guards look like they need bodyguards, then you should hire new
security guards.

Saw some guy this morning enter the restroom, wash his hands, go to the urinal, come back to
the sink to wash his hands again, and then use some hand sanitizer on the way out. First
thing that pops in my head: “That gentleman’s genitals must be absolutely filthaaaaay!”

“I’m not familiar precisely with exactly what I said but I stand by what I said whatever it
was.”  –Mitt Romney

Casual “wheelchairing” ain’t cool. If you don’t need one, then walk. If I see one more
person GET OUT of their wheelchair, straighten it up, and then get back in it, I’m going to
climb to the nearby highest point, scream like Ric Flair, leap off, drop-kick that person in
the chest, and send ’em rolling backwards into the traffic.

“Moo moo sah fah lah fah taffy can!” –what some nut said this morning on the street

Saw this guy on the bus the other day.  Had to get a pic of his shoes.  …I pray the Lord my sole to keep…